hello!
so I am going to sorta cop-out on a blog here. due to time restraints and a lack of creativity, I am just going to quickly list the ideas one person has about what helps to make "happy families." this is from the keynote speaker- Ann Pleshette Murphy- at the For the Love of Kids Conference I attended on Saturday. I think she had some good thoughts...Happy Families:
- make room for unhappiness (welcome a range of emotions)
- be permissive with feelings and strict with behavior
- open your ears, close your mouth (empathize with kids)
- set loving limits (pick your battles and follow through)
- provide 3 character builders: limits, opportunities to stumble, and responsibilities
- win the chore wars (get kids involved early and make them routine)
- eat together
- create rituals (laugh with- and at- one another)
- take control of the calendar (embrace boredom, build in down-time, make sleep a priority)
- ignore the Joneses (don't use your kids as billboards)
- help other families
4 comments:
I don't think that was a cop out blog. It was a very good one!
I agree with SJT that this was great.
The one that resounded the most with me was the pick your battles, and follow through. I think it's really easy to not follow through when the kid (or in my case, dog) starts acting crazy and you just don't want to keep fighting, and it's also easy to just pick at them for a bunch of little things that won't matter a bit in the long run. We have to make the conscious decision (over and over) to set the limits and stick to them and to let the little things go.
Actually, looking over the list again, every bit of it is great. Chores - I think all kids should have them. I make Tommy help me with work and I make him clean up toys and markers and things that he uses. This is important preparation for LIFE.
Embracing boredom and welcoming a range of emotions - those are huge. Kids don't need and probably shouldn't have constant stimulation. And expecting that they will always be happy is just silly. They are going to experience frustration, disappointment, and sometimes even rage at what happens to them. Might as well model healthy coping mechanisms to them now.
I could go on and on. This lady sounds like she really has got it together! Thanks for sharing!
man, this list rocks. I love the eating together one and the Joneses one. Oh, and chores. I was the "dishwasher" my whole life growing up and man, i hated it then but i'm sure it helped build character. :-)
The list was great, but what I liked most was the picture of Jason with the cutest ever hat. What a great choice!
love, Great Aunt Vicki
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